Family of 4 Photos, part i

During my research phase, I discovered (or rediscovered - I think I had heard of them before) Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep (NILMDTS), which "provides the gift of remembrance photography for parents suffering the loss of a baby".   They are a nonprofit that recruits and trains photographers who provide their services free of charge.  "Lucky" for us, we had time in advance to make arrangements with a NILMDTS photographer, so we contacted a few local NILMDTS photographers, and a lovely lady, Melissa Distel, agreed to take pictures of Joy after her birth.  I wanted to meet her before Joy's birth, and also wanted to get some family pictures, so we did a photo session with her at a local park.

I was worried that I would be uncomfortably huge at the end of my pregnancy, so we had the pictures taken at the end of April, about three months before I was due.  Thankfully, I didn't suffer from polyhydramnios and didn't get any larger than your average pregnant lady, so we could have waited a bit, but it's still clear I'm pregnant.

These pictures are so bittersweet to me.  We decided long before Joy's birth that we wouldn't take Liam to the hospital when she was born, unless she lived significantly longer than expected.  God willing, we have years and years to spend with Liam, but wanted to soak up the short time we had with our little girl with no distractions.  So most likely, these would be our only photos as a family of four.

We have a couple of these printed and displayed around our house, kind of an "Ebenezer" (a reminder of God's presence and help) to God's faithfulness to us in this time as well as a tribute to our daughter. But honestly, in looking back through all the pictures in preparation for this post, some of my favorites are ones we don't have out.  They're the candid ones of us interacting with Liam, of us just enjoying each other and being silly.  Because honestly, Liam was one big bright spot in the midst of the sadness of those months of carrying Joy.  Facing the prospect of losing one child, I was able to better appreciate the gift of the little firecracker I had already been given.  I honestly can't imagine carrying Joy without having her big brother there as a motivation to get my sad and tired behind off of the couch, as a reason and inspiration to smile and laugh through some very difficult moments.  It's hard to wallow in misery when you have a 2 year old to entertain and to entertain you. 

There's a lot of these, so I'll probably spread them over two posts.  Enjoy!

 Liam was at such a ham stage at this age. He kept lifting up his shirt to get a laugh!

 He was also very distracted by planes, cars, people, you name it.